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Unmarried Partners & Military Benefits

Military benefits require legal marriage or DEERS enrollment. If you and your partner aren't married, this page explains exactly what that means — and what you can still do to protect each other.

Your Partner Is Not a Dependent

Under federal law, military benefits such as BAH at the “with dependents” rate, TRICARE health coverage, commissary and exchange access, and on-base family housing all require your partner to be a legal dependent — which means marriage or, in limited cases, a qualifying child. An unmarried partner has none of these benefits automatically.

This is not a policy that varies by installation or branch. It is federal law. The sections below cover each area in detail and explain what you can do.

Housing

  • Your partner can be listed on your off-base lease — landlords decide who is on the lease, not the military.
  • You receive BAH at the “without dependents” rate, which is lower than the with-dependents rate.
  • Your partner cannot live in on-base family housing with you — that requires a legal dependent.
  • If you live in the barracks, your partner cannot live with you under any circumstances.

Healthcare

Your partner is not eligible for TRICARE. Options to explore:

  • Employer insurance— if your partner's employer offers coverage, this is often the simplest path.
  • Health Insurance Marketplace — visit healthcare.gov or your state's exchange for individual plans, including ACA subsidies.
  • Medicaid — in states that expanded Medicaid, income-based coverage may be available. Eligibility depends on household income, not military status.

Base Access

Your partner can get a sponsored visitor pass, but the process and limitations vary by installation:

  • Most bases require you to escort your partner or pre-approve an unescorted pass through the Visitor Control Center (VCC).
  • Contact the VCC at your installation for the exact process and paperwork.
  • Access is not guaranteed and can be revoked by installation commanders at any time for any reason.
  • A visitor pass does not grant commissary, exchange, or medical facility access.

Legal Protections You Can Set Up Now

Marriage is not required for these protections. Visit the Legal Assistance Office on base — services are free for active-duty members.

  • Power of Attorney (POA) — allows your partner to handle financial and legal matters on your behalf during deployment or absence. General or limited POA available.
  • Healthcare Proxy / Medical POA — authorizes your partner to make medical decisions if you are incapacitated.
  • SGLI Beneficiary— you can name anyone as the beneficiary of your Servicemembers' Group Life Insurance, including an unmarried partner. Update this through your unit or MyPay.
  • Emergency Contact Designation — designate your partner as an emergency contact in your personnel file so the unit can notify them in a crisis.

The Path to Full Benefits

Marriage is the only path to full dependent benefits. After you marry:

  • Enroll your spouse in DEERS (Defense Enrollment Eligibility Reporting System) within 30 days of marriage — bring your marriage certificate to the nearest ID card office.
  • BAH increases to the “with dependents” rate immediately upon DEERS enrollment.
  • TRICARE eligibility begins the date of marriage.
  • On-base family housing waitlist eligibility opens.
  • Commissary and exchange access is granted via the new dependent ID card.